I Know The Plans I Have for You!

Well, it has been two weeks since I posted last, and truthfully I cannot even feel that much time has passed.  I have been focusing on living in a slow motion world.  Everything else around me is moving at normal speed, but I am not.
Within the week I will be starting the adrenal therapy.  Huge life modifications.  Eating low carb or gluten free can be difficult, but for me and my diabetes, coupled with the edrenal problems, I will have to do both.  I will be taking a wide range of supplements to compliment this strange new world of eatting.  And somehow I will try to introduce gentle, non-stressful exercise into my days.
Last Friday I heard back from the specialist and will be having a hysterectomy on the 23rd of May.  I go in on the 8th for my pre-op appointment and will be having blood work and an EKG.  They want to make sure I am up to this surgery.
I would love to say I am, and I hope that I am, or at least will be with the adrenal therapy.  But it has been a hard couple months since the last one.  I have ran the gamut from pushing through the pain and fatigue to sleeping all the time.  Now I have managed to figure out how to function slower and mostly skip naps, but definitely not be as "productive" as I felt I needed to be.  I am getting done what I need to be doing and the other stuff either doesn't get done or someone else does it.  Our house is always filled with family and so they have been pretty good about seeing something that needs to be done and just doing it.  Nothing is as I would have it, if I had a choice, but that is not to be.  My happy medium is I am able to do what is necessary for homeschooling, get some small chores done, lay down quite a bit, and when I feel the fatigue and light headedness coming on I stop what I am doing instead of pushing through.
Do I know what tomorrow or even next week or month holds?  I think I do, but going through the unknown valley I am in right now just reinforces the fact that I have no idea.  Who really does?  We plan and we try to figure out where we are going in life, but ultimately we do not know.  So what is a person to do? To not feel like giving up hope, or to keep from being overcome with depression. Trust in the Creator of the Universe.  The Savior of our Souls.  The one who gives meaning to our lives.  I would like to share scripture with you that reminds me of this and what I am here for.  One God was kind enough to give to the Women's Ministry team from last year, for this year.  Jeremiah 29:11.  No one last year would have known that I, or so many others, were going to need to remember this truth.  But we did!  I pray that these give you encouragement on your journey and in your plans.

Blessings,
Stephanie


Jeremiah 29:11
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.


Proverbs 16:9
In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps



Ephesians 1:11-12
 11 In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, 12 in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory.


Psalm 33:10-12
New International Version (NIV)
 10 The LORD foils the plans of the nations;
   he thwarts the purposes of the peoples.
11 But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever,
   the purposes of his heart through all generations.
 12 Blessed is the nation whose God is the LORD,
   the people he chose for his inheritance.


Proverbs 16:3
Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.

Sometimes Encouragement comes in Silent Doses!

Good Friday, two days ago, I got a late day call from the doctor that I have this condition that she thought I might have. She said that basically I am full of these tumors and that I would need a hysterectomy.  I had thought I was past anything being wrong but just being in unexplained pain.  I thought I would rejoice in a diagnosis, but that is when I thought I knew what I had.  Now with something new and unknown, but needing to be taken care of, I found myself taken by surprise.  

I went to service and found it hard to concentrate.  It was a communion service and I worried that I could not give proper focus to Jesus with such a burden on my heart.  I listened to the sermon and I could see scenes from The Passion of Christ as the pastor talked.  That is when I knew how much my Savior had paid a price for me.  It is one thing to read it, it is another to feel it come off the screen at you.

After the bread had been passed out and we were silently praying I was trying to repent of my worry, my failings, my weakness... all the weight I was carrying and just focus on how great our Savior is.  I was praising His name and His attributes, but was having a hard time focusing as I felt my husband had his arm around me.  I was so acutely aware of it's presence and the way he comfortingly stroked my back that I found myself caught up in that.  I opened my eyes to tell him I couldn't concentrate and I saw his hands were folded in his lap as he, too, prayed.  

I dropped my head and was again shocked for the second time that night. Taking in that the whole time I was praying and wanting to focus on the Lord he was right there with his arm around me.  There could be no other explanation. I took communion with a peace in my heart and a renewed appreciation for how the Lord knows what it is to need silent encouragement. 

I thought about Him in the garden before they came and arrested him.  He left his disciples and asked them to watch and pray and he went off to be by himself to pray.  Earnestly praying.  Please read Luke 22:39-46.  Things just didn't seem to go right and his disciples proved to be of no strength and encouragement.  When he could not take much more  'An angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened him'.

One day at a time, with its failures and fears. Whether it was an Angel or the Lord himself matters little to me because both come from God.  A loving God that saw my anguish and my true love for Him and comforted me in a personal way; no words were necessary.  

I think about when I lost my Grammie and the only thing I could handle was my husband holding me as my very being mourned the loss.  

What a loving God we have.  I pray that if you are not walking close with our Lord or do not know Him that you will read the "Healing the Hole in Your Heart" tab at the top of the page.  You will never receive comfort like what the Lord gives.  Praying you receive the comfort you need today.

A very good poem :)

ONE DAY AT A TIME

By Annie Johnson Flint

With its hurts and mistakes, with its weakness and tears,

With its portion of pain and its burden of care;

One day at a time we must meet and must bear.

One day at a time to be patient and strong;

To be calm under trial and sweet under wrong;

Then its toiling shall pass and its sorrow shall cease;

It shall darken and die, and the night shall bring peace.

One day at a time – but the day is so long,

And the heart is not brave, and the soul is not strong,

O Thou pitiful Christ, be Thou near all the way;

Give courage and patience and strength for the day.

Swift cometh His answer, so clear and so sweet;

“Yea, I will be with thee, thy troubles to meet;

I will not forget thee, nor fail thee, nor grieve;

I will not forsake thee; I never will leave.”

Not yesterday’s load we are called on to bear,

Nor the morrow’s uncertain and shadowy care;

Why should we look forward or back with dismay?

Our needs, as our mercies, are but for the day.

One day at a time, and the day is His day;

He hath numbered its hours, though they haste or delay.

His grace is sufficient; we walk not alone;

As the day, so the strength that He giveth His own.

The Skit Guys presentation of Good Friday

click on this link: Good Friday